I will NOT heat

Every year, without fail yet in my short little life, summer leads to fall, and fall leads to winter. You know there is no going back, you know you've entered that dark, cold season the day you decide to turn on the heat.
I was wearing socks and warm pj's and a sweater and at some points considered finding some mitts today at home. I could have just turned on the heat. Like most houses in North America I have a full heating system set up in every room of my house, which for a very reasonable price will warm my entire home to a comfy no sock needed space. But no, instead I cooked, swept and mopped the floors. I installed lamps and moved furniture. I started rearranging my closet and made the bed. I danced to loud music, had a hot shower, drank tea, a little rum too and i cuddled with my cat, which is not really my cat. And now I'm sitting at second cup where I can convince myself that sitting in a public space which is heated is not the same as heating my own home. Once I heat you see, it's all over. It is me giving up any hope of winter waiting a little longer to stretch its mean cold angry fingers and drag me down the rabbit hole of depression which is the reality of the longest Canadian season.
I was born here, in Quebec, have lived here a good part of my life. Montreal is HOME. I love so many things about my home town. I do not LOVE the cold. Understatement of the year. Every year it gets harder and harder to make it through. There is very little good I can say about this season. I like those one or two amazing snow days where the sun makes the entire world look like it was dipped in sugar. I love the coziness of the home that you can only understand if you've lived in a northern climate. Home becomes a living creature that wraps you up and makes you feel save, loved cared for. The smallest little twinkling light or candle can have the most magical effect on an entire room in a way that is just not possible in the heat. Scarves, sweaters, leg warmers because I'm an 80's child hot tea and hot coco, root veggies, big socks, soup. These are the things that make it possible to survive this harsh weather. I love these things. But I would give them all up to never again feel that pain I get in my back when I walk in the cold. It starts way up high and then my entire body clenches and my back becomes so stiff from top to bottom and shooting pain radiates in every direction. No worries, the pain will stop in oh, six or seven months. Hahahhaha I wish I was kidding.
This is winter for me. This is why I will not admit that it has arrived yet and will not turn the heat on. Not yet. I will make it to November... I WILL.

I'm not an old lady, I just do old lady things...

I had a little bit of a rough year this year, was not feeling so hot this past winter (oh shit, it's almost winter again) I ended up spending a lot of time curled up on my couch. Not my style! I like to be out and busy and with people... all the time.

Busy bee...

So, bored, on the couch, in a ball, I decided I wanted to make a gift for my soon to be born new nephew. I discovered that I LOVE to sew during a visit to Chris and Gail's for New years. Not machine tactactactac your project is done, you blew an ear drum you have to put the machine away sew. But slow, sit on the couch hand sew, imperfect stitch projects. LOVE IT. Not sure why.  

My first project was Mr. Hippo, yes I know he's a Rhino not a Hippo. And yes, I find that funny, please stop judging my sense of humor.

Mr. Hippo

Completing this little guy by hand with nothing more than scissors, a needle and some tread gave me so much satisfactions. I wanted to find a bigger project that would allow me to sew, by hand, and cut fabric and make something! 

What better excuse than a baby to take on grandma project? A quilt, the ultimate grandmother project, the holy grail of hand sewing, couch sitting, fabric cutting endeavors. 

I had not realized that I would need a math degree to complete this project. This was suppose to be mindless! Ha.. should of paid attention in school (actually I did but I just dint understand what they were saying)

Baby Rocco came early. I blame him for not having the quilt ready for his birth...(took months longer than expected, even if he would of been born two months late I would not have been done)  

During the making of this blanket.... because in the end that's all it really is. I came to understand the beauty of mass produced goods. We can buy the most beautiful things of the highest quality for next to nothing! I appreciate that now. I'm being completely serious. I LOVE the quilt I made. Love that it took me months of tedious work. Love the callouses on my fingers that remind me of my accomplishment. Love that I set out to do something I knew nothing about and accomplished it (Thank you utube), rather well. I love that I'm now being asked to teach others how to make quilts. Love that Rocco inspired me even before he was born. I loved having a project to see me through the hard winter, realizing I actually can do math and math has practical real world applications. Overall I loved this project, a lot. But... I also see the value of mass production. 

The finished quilt

This is my finished quilt. Pretty right! Here is where mass production fails. This is not just blanket. There are no others like it. So we give it more value. We are satisfied with just one blanket. Having everything so easily takes away the satisfaction of having it.  Make something that takes six months to make and tell me if you like it better than something you bought at Winners.

HAHAHHA I even sounds like an old lady now! Anyhoo, this is my first quilt here are a few more pictures.

 

The back...

The front...

In the making.... math not working out

Detail of the work

Rocco on the unfinished quilt

FiveFinger - Waiting for the pain

Alex (big brother that I still listen to unquestionably even tough I know it's often a bad bad idea) has been talking to me about these ridiculous looking shoes for years. I've always been intrigued but not willing to take the leap. This weekend I finally got them! My old running shoes were getting too old, and I thought why not? Why not... here's why not... I literally look like a gorilla from the ankles down and the look taints any good stuff going on from the ankles up. I never realized how flattering it is to hide my feet in nice little nike shoes, fold my cute little gym sock just so, and yes I admit it, I match my gym socks to my sports bra, or tank top. Never so matched that anyone would know I had done it on purpose. Ok, so now that I'm standing in the gym, looking like a half woman, half monkey creature I proceed to embarrassed myself, yes, more than just the monkey feet, when I uttered a little too loudly because I had my Ipod playing "Oh shit Matt, my shoes dont match my gloves anymore" Here's a hint, if you think you are hard core enough to wear gloves to the gym, then you should really not care if your outfit matches.

Secret, I wear the gloves because I have delicate princess hands that callus if I look at a weights, and I like to look like I know what I'm doing. I grunt a lot for effect too.

Ok so here I am, red faced, uncoordinated outfit, wearing gloves (that do not match anything) and I repeatedly trip, stub my little toe and twist it in an unnatural way. I say stub my toe and not my foot because in these FiveFinger butes you can stub one toe at a time. You may get all toes, or just a couple, you may stub them to stub and twist or get it caught so that it's left behind when you try to take a step forward. All fun options. I love options. Lots and lots of them. Apparently I dont lift my feet when I walk around in the gym. Hey at least I've learned new things and discovered myself a little.

All this to say, I worked out with my new shoes, two days in a row... and finished the whole thing off with a run. At the best of times my body screams after I go to the gym. Lately it's been worse than ever, returning from a year of sitting on the couch in a ball. A week ago I had worked out my legs and could not put my foot flat on the floor for two days. 

So, here I sit on a very stormy, cold feels like fall is here after another too short summer, waiting, anticipating the pain that is surely coming from using all those little muscles I have never used. All the little muscles that the FiveFingers promise you will now get to. My toes finally feeling better after having been shoved into individual rubber casings that spread them apart in an unnatural way... yes adding to the monkey look... Ahhh I should have read the box that warned to only use these "shoes" if you can call them that, for five minutes at a time until you body can adjust. oups...I never was much for instruction manuals. 

Let the fun begin!

My first blog entry ever!

Blogs are little like having exhibitionist diary...which is why I think I like the idea so much!

I love reading blogs and getting inspired to do new things, explore, make fun stuff. (read, I love having a snooping window into other people's lives...) I love laughing at my friends stories and feeling proud of how witty, creative and self deprecating they are. I like feeling connected with those that I live far from and miss so much... Somehow reading their blogs is less work than calling. So, in the spirit of getting inspired...and liking to copy other... I'm gonna give this a go and see if I might have anything to say and share (only fair that I offer up a window into my life too, in the event that anyone wants to peek in).

Enjoy the view!